The fables below come from Bryce's First Greek Reader, while the joke comes from Abbott's Easy Greek Reader, both of which are available at the Internet Archive.
You'll find the fables and joke below, first in Greek, then segmented, and then interwoven with English. The titles are linked to the Internet Archive page.
Ἵππος κατεῖχε λειμῶνα μόνος, ἐλθόντος δ᾽ ἐλάφου καὶ διαφθείροντος τὴν νομὴν βουλόμενος τιμωρήσασθαι τὸν ἔλαφον ἠρώτα τιν' ἄνθρωπον εἰ δύναιτο μετ᾽ αὐτοῦ κολάσαι τὸν ἔλαφον, ὁ δ᾽ ἔφησεν, ἐὰν λάβῃ χαλινὸν καὶ αὐτὸς ἀναβῇ ἐπ᾽ αὐτὸν ἔχων ἀκόντια: συνομολογήσαντος δὲ καὶ ἀναβάντος ἀντὶ τοῦ τιμωρήσασθαι αὐτὸς ἐδούλευσεν ἤδη τῷ ἀνθρώπῳ.
Ἵππος κατεῖχε λειμῶνα μόνος,
ἐλθόντος δ᾽ ἐλάφου
καὶ διαφθείροντος τὴν νομὴν
βουλόμενος τιμωρήσασθαι τὸν ἔλαφον
ἠρώτα τιν' ἄνθρωπον
εἰ δύναιτο μετ᾽ αὐτοῦ κολάσαι τὸν ἔλαφον,
ὁ δ᾽ ἔφησεν,
ἐὰν λάβῃ χαλινὸν
καὶ αὐτὸς ἀναβῇ ἐπ᾽ αὐτὸν
ἔχων ἀκόντια:
συνομολογήσαντος δὲ
καὶ ἀναβάντος ἀντὶ τοῦ τιμωρήσασθαι
αὐτὸς ἐδούλευσεν ἤδη τῷ ἀνθρώπῳ.
Ἵππος κατεῖχε ... A horse was master
λειμῶνα μόνος ... of a meadow all to himself
ἐλθόντος δ᾽ ἐλάφου ... but when a deer came
καὶ διαφθείροντος τὴν νομὴν ... and wrecked the pasture
βουλόμενος ... the horse wanted
τιμωρήσασθαι τὸν ἔλαφον ... to get revenge on the deer
ἠρώτα τιν' ἄνθρωπον ... and he asked a human being
εἰ μετ᾽ αὐτοῦ δύναιτο ... if with him he could
κολάσαι τὸν ἔλαφον ... punish the deer,
ὁ δ᾽ ἔφησεν ... the man said
ἐὰν λάβῃ χαλινὸν ... if the horse would accept a bridle
καὶ αὐτὸς ἀναβῇ ἐπ᾽ αὐτὸν ... and let the man mount him
ἔχων ἀκόντια ... while wielding his javelin:
συνομολογήσαντος δὲ ... and when the horse agreed
καὶ ἀναβάντος ... and the man mounted him
ἀντὶ τοῦ τιμωρήσασθαι ... instead of getting revenge
αὐτὸς ἐδούλευσεν ἤδη ... the horse was then a slave
τῷ ἀνθρώπῳ ... to the man.
Γεωργοῦ παῖς ὤπτα κοχλίας· ἀκούσας δὲ αὐτῶν τρυζόντων, ἔφη, Ὦ κάκιστα ζῶα, τῶν οἰκιῶν ὑμῶν ἐμπιπραμένων, αὐτοὶ ᾄδετε;
Γεωργοῦ παῖς
ὤπτα κοχλίας·
ἀκούσας δὲ αὐτῶν
τρυζόντων,
ἔφη,
Ὦ κάκιστα ζῶα,
τῶν οἰκιῶν ὑμῶν ἐμπιπραμένων,
αὐτοὶ ᾄδετε;
Γεωργοῦ παῖς ... A farmer's child
ὤπτα κοχλίας ... was roasting snails,
ἀκούσας δὲ αὐτῶν ... and when he heard them
τρυζόντων ... sizzling,
ἔφη ... he said,
Ὦ κάκιστα ζῶα ... O wretched creatures,
τῶν οἰκιῶν ὑμῶν ἐμπιπραμένων ... your homes are on fire,
αὐτοὶ ᾄδετε ... and you're singing?
Δυσκόλῳ ἰατρῷ προσελθών τις εἶπε· σοφιστὰ, ἀνακεῖσθαι οὐ δύναμαι, οὐδὲ ἑστάναι, ἀλλ' οὐδὲ καθῆσθαι. καὶ ὁ ἰατρὸς εἶπεν, οὐδὲν σοι λείπει ἢ κρεμασθῆναι.
Δυσκόλῳ ἰατρῷ
προσελθών τις εἶπε·
σοφιστὰ,
ἀνακεῖσθαι οὐ δύναμαι,
οὐδὲ ἑστάναι,
ἀλλ' οὐδὲ καθῆσθαι.
καὶ ὁ ἰατρὸς εἶπεν,
οὐδὲν σοι λείπει
ἢ κρεμασθῆναι.
προσελθών τις ... Someone went
δυσκόλῳ ἰατρῷ ... to a grumpy physician
εἶπε ... and said,
σοφιστὰ ... Doctor,
ἀνακεῖσθαι οὐ δύναμαι ... I can't lie down,
οὐδὲ ἑστάναι ... and I can't stand,
ἀλλ' οὐδὲ καθῆσθαι ... and I can't sit either.
καὶ ὁ ἰατρὸς εἶπεν ... And the physician said,
οὐδὲν σοι λείπει ... Nothing left to do then
ἢ κρεμασθῆναι ... except hang yourself.
And here's a random proverb and a random LOLCat too:
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